Confessions of an Idiot Couple
by Bexara
Summary: An argument gets a little too personal and suddenly all of Karasuno is made aware of the true nature of Kageyama's and Hinata's relationship. BL KaheHina fic M for language and themes


When Kageyama came in with a black eye and an even blacker mood, the other members of Karasuno figured it was better not to mention it. At least most of them did.

"Bwahaha," Tanaka chortled loudly, "that's some shiner you got there."

"Yes, did one of Your Highness's subjects finally revolt?" Tsukishima joined in gleefully.

Kageyama's lips thinned and he gave his sniggering teammates a withering glare.

Tanaka pounded him on the back. "Ah don't be like that, Kageyama. Seriously though," the older boy leaned in conspiratorially, "did you get into an argument with a door and lose?" And then, of course, he was off laughing riotously at his own joke.

"Hey, Tanaka, Tsukishima," Suaga hissed somewhat desperately as Kageyama's face pinched tight into a dark mask of seething fury, "you guys cut it out."

"I got into a fight with a wild monkey." Kageyama finally spoke in a deceptively quiet voice that didn't fool anyone.

Hinata's sudden, angry "Hey!" had half the team shaking their heads and the other half sighing. So it had been Hinata that had given Kageyama the black eye. They should have known.

Kageyama turned toward Hinata and the look that passed between them was practically crackling.

Daichi wearily rubbed his forehead. These problem children of his were going to be the death of him some day.

"Look, Hinata, Kageyama, I don't know why you were fighting this time but—

"It was Kageyama's fault!" Hinata cried out.

"I said I was sorry, dammit!" Kageyama took a step forward, fists clenched at his side.

"Oi, you bastards, talking over Daichi-san again!"

The two boys ignored Tanaka. Like always seemed to happen when their tempers flared, they didn't see anyone else but each other.

"Well, if apologies were enough, then we wouldn't need the fire department!"

"It's the police, dumbass!

"Whatever," Hinata tromped over to glare up Kageyama. "It freaking hurt, stupid!"

Daichi tried again to interrupt. "Guys, please listen—

"Even if it did you didn't have to kick me in the face!"

To everyone's surprise, Hinata's anger deflated like a balloon and he blushed. "What was I supposed to do?! It was my first time and I was scared."

The stiffness went out of Kageyama's body. "It was my first time too, idiot Hinata!" There was a subtle reddening in his cheeks. "Then you kicked me on my ass and left and wouldn't answer my calls or texts. It pissed me off."

By then, the light of understanding started to dawn on the others watching their little show. Tanaka froze, paling like all the blood in his body had just drained out. Tsukishima wrinkled his nose in disgust and turned his back on the whole mess, Yamaguchi right behind him—though Yamaguchi did cast a wide-eyed glance backward. Asahi's eyes, on the other hand, rolled up in his head and he fell over. Luckily Noya, still somewhat oblivious to what was transpiring right before him, saw Asahi pass out and leaped forward, sliding across the floor to catch the bigger man before his head touched the ground.

"Asahi-san fainted!" Noya yelled over his shoulder, but even the sight of his small frame holding Asahi's large body like a princess wasn't enough to take the others' attention away from Hinata and Kageyama.

Suga bit his lip, not knowing whether to laugh or cry at his underclassmen's misfortune and rather bold way of announcing their relationship to the world. The Captain's face, after he processed everything he'd just heard, went from shock to horror to embarrassment and back to shock like he couldn't settle on exactly what he was feeling at that moment. Enoshita and the other second years just backed slowly away, pretending they didn't know what was going on.

Kageyama finally, _finally_ realized the enormity of what he and Hinata had just let spill in front of their entire team and there was nothing subtle now about the vivid scarlet suffusing his face. Hinata though, remained blissfully ignorant.

"Then maybe you should be on bottom next time and see how it fe—

"Don't say anything else!" Kageyama yanked Hinata forward, slapping a hand over his mouth.

Hinata glowered up at him, muffled sounds of outrage coming from behind his hand.

Wishing for a do-over, not just of the past few minutes but last night and maybe the whole damn week while he was at it, Kageyama bowed stiffly to Daichi. He wondered if even the crown of his head was red. Hinata, still plastered to the front of his body, was forced to bend over, too.

"We're sorry for disturbing practice. It won't happen again."

"You shouldn't make promises you can't keep, Your Highness," Tsukishima quipped mockingly, turning around to raise one annoying blond eyebrow in his direction. Yamaguchi giggled.

He didn't stand up, but Kageyama cut his eyes sideways, giving Tsukishima a look of such pure loathing that the taller boy faked a shiver. "Ooo, scary."

"That's," Daichi cleared his throat and smiled weakly, "that's fine. As long as you understand."

However, if Kageyama thought that would be the end of it, he was miserably mistaken.

"If you two could stop flirting for a few minutes, I'd like to receive some tosses," Tsukishima smirked at them an hour into practice after Kageyama grabbed Hinata in a headlock for being particularly clumsy.

Kageyama let go so fast Hinata face planted onto the floor. He had to buy his boyfriend—and yeah just thinking that made his stomach knot up—a whole case of meat buns and repeatedly kiss the red mark on Hinata's chin before he was forgiven.

The next day after the big revelation, a widely smiling Noya clapped Hinata on the back. "I don't really get it but it seems you and Kageyama announced you were a couple to everyone. Good for you, Shouyou."

Kageyama had patiently, well patiently for him at least (he only used "dumbass" four times through the whole ordeal), explained to Hinata that thanks to their argument the team not only knew they were together but also knew that they'd tried to have sex. So, Noya's admiring compliment predictably resulted in Hinata exploding into color and missing every toss Kageyama sent him for the next thirty minutes.

Then, on Wednesday, Tanaka cornered Kageyama in the locker room.

"Here," he thrust a brown paper bag in Kageyama's direction, appearing equal parts pleased and uncomfortable, "I had my big sis buy this for you and Hinata. Good luck." Tanaka hauled out of there like his ass was on fire before Kageyama could say anything.

"What is it?" Hinata came up behind him, grabbing his hips and standing on tiptoes in order to look over his shoulder.

Kageyama was pretty sure he did _not_ want to open that bag, but Hinata was practically vibrating with excitement against his back, which at any other time would be very interesting but not right then. Swallowing hard, he cautiously unfolded the flap. Staring up at him was a box of condoms—_Ribbed for Her Pleasure_ the bright red sticker proudly proclaimed—and a bottle of strawberry flavored personal lubricant.

"Oh," Hinata puffed softly against the back of his neck. "That's um for …"

His voice trailed off and he buried his head between Kageyama's shoulder blades. Kageyama wished he could hide, too, but his unwillingly fascinated gaze was fixed firmly to the bag's contents. He felt his whole body warm, and knew it wasn't just the mortification from having hissenpai give him rubbers and lube. He should return the stuff to Tanaka, that was his first thought. Yet instead his hands opened his locker, unzipped his gym bag and stuffed the paper sack deep inside. It was a gift from his _senpai_, after all, it would be rude to turn it down.

Asahi might have been the worst of all of them, though. For the rest of the week, he kept staring at the general vicinity of Kageyama's crotch—which was disturbing by itself—and then turning looks of sympathy on Hinata. Additionally, every time Hinata jumped, squatted or hit the ground, he would rush over and ask if the younger boy's butt was alright.

Hinata, the naïve idiot, simply looked confused, but Kageyama got it. Most of the other guys did, too judging by the awkward laughs and averted gazes. He guessed he should probably feel flattered that they all thought he had a big one, but it was hard to be smug when you were humiliated down to the very cells in your blood.

Besides, after that first failed attempt, he and Hinata hadn't tried again. No matter that Tanaka's "present" was practically burning a hole in his dresser drawer where he had hidden it.

To be fair, it wasn't all bad. Daichi and Suga didn't treat them any different, and other than Tsukishima making snide comments at them, now that they were recognized as a couple no on batted an eye at Hinata's tendency to hang all over him (when they weren't arguing, of course) or the times his fingers unconsciously sifted through Hinata's hair when he was thinking hard. It was actually sort of a relief to have it all out in the open because hiding it for much longer would definitely have eventually interfered with their dynamics on the court.

They had practice the following Saturday, and it was grueling. Kageyama didn't mind. Indeed he relished the harshness of their drills and mini-matches. Volleyball wasn't just a game to him, it was life. He submersed himself in the feel and sound and scent of it. Hinata was focused, too, more than once exhibiting that intensity and hunger for victory that never failed to give Kageyama chills. They got into the zone, perfectly in sync, he finding that perfect spot for the toss and Hinata slamming it down every time.

The end, sadly, came too soon. Kageyama had been having so much fun he'd lost track of time and practice was over before he knew it.

"One more time!" He heard Hinata cry out and knew he wasn't the only one reluctant to stop.

"It's already dark outside, dummy!" Tanaka thumped Hinata on the head.

"Tanaka is right," Daichi wiped an arm over his damp brow, "it's late and we've been practicing for hours."

Hinata's shoulders slumped.

"It's good that you are so enthusiastic," Coach walked up to them, "but you also need to take care of your body, Hinata."

For some reason, over a dozen pairs of eyes turned accusingly toward Kageyama. He flinched. Dammit, it wasn't like he was jumping Hinata every chance he got. Besides, he was the one who had suffered bodily damage last time! He folded his arms across his chest and scowled back at them.

After a few more words and suggestions for things to work on, Coach dismissed the team. They cleaned the gym, put away the balls and nets, and headed toward the locker room to change. Suga's voice calling out to him stopped Kageyama before he could follow the other guys.

"Hey, Kageyama, do you have a sec?"

He nodded and Suga beckoned him over. There was a black gym bag on the floor by the benches. The older teen squatted down, opening it and digging around inside.

"Just a sec," he murmured. "Ah! There it is."

He pulled an object out of the bag and stood up.

"This is something that has worked for Daichi and me so I thought it might help you and Hinata, too." He held out his arm, revealing a thick, white book.

Kageyama took it from him, turning it right side up so he could read the title. _Make Him Moan: A Guide to Amazing Gay Sex_. His mouth fell open. There were so many things running through his brain as he stared down at the book but what came out was a squeaky, "You and the Captain?!"

Suga's lips quirked upward and put a finger to his lips. "Don't tell anyone. Unlike you and Hinata, Daichi is really shy." Bending over, he picked the bag up and slung it over his shoulder. "Oh, and we particularly enjoy page 106."

Leaving a stunned Kageyama staring after him, Suga walked away. Kageyama looked back down at the book. With shaking fingers, he opened it, flipping until he found page 106. His mouth went dry and his pulse jackrabbited. The image of Suga and Daichi doing _that_ tried to settle into his brain. He didn't let it, slamming the book so fast and hard the sound of it closing echoed through the gym.

Breathing hard, he stuck the book under his shirt. Stepping into the locker room, he couldn't look at either of his senpai.

Once he was home and locked safely in his room, however, he took the book back out, and when Hinata came over to spend the night, page 106 was the first thing Kageyama tried.

Much, much later, Hinata panted hotly in his ear. "Where did you get that book?"

Wheezing and twitching from an orgasm so intense he'd blacked out for a second, Kageyama managed to hoarsely whisper, "Sugawara-san."

"Suga-san is a genius."

Kageyama couldn't argue with that.


End file.
